God sent us His angels a year ago today…

A year ago today I received the worst phone call I wouldn’t even wish my worst enemy to receive. It brings back memories and takes me back to that day. 

I can’t help but keep on watching my husband, making sure he is doing okay, hoping deep inside that it doesn’t happen again.

Yet, I feel this overwhelming gratitude to God for keeping my husband safe and sending His angels to care for him. 

I have my husband beside me today because God made sure His angels were there at the right place, at the right time. God has never abandoned us, and through our lives, He has always been there to guide us, hold our hand, and showered Hos love for us. 

I will never tire of telling the world how God has taken care of us. Despite the trials, the bumps, the difficult paths we encounter along the way, He has always been there. And we are forever grateful for His love for us. We may not be perfect, but in God’s eyes, we are and always will be His children who He loves and protects.

Thank you, Lord for always holding us in the palm of your hand. May we be able to use all these blessings for Your greater glory. 

Songs…

Songs…an expression of one’s feelings in the form of musical notes and inspiring words. 

How many times have we turned on the radio to listen to music and upon hearing the beginnings of a familiar song, we find ourselves smiling and reminiscing events from another time in another place? Happy memories filled with special people we’ve shared precious moments with occupy our mind as we listen to the lyrics of this special song. 

We could also find ourselves frowning, sometimes even teary-eyed when a particular song takes us back to a moment we would rather forget or it could remind us of someone we loved and lost.

Songs can take us to an emotional journey that can either make us soar in the happiness that fills our heart, free us from the bonds of sadness, or keep us wallowing in the maudlin thoughts that keep us trapped in an abyss of loneliness. 

All these depend on our choices of the music we play. In the end, it will always be our choice that determines whether the song we listen to brings us joy or sadness.  

The Day God Sent Angels to Save my Husband – Part III

“Things happen for a reason…when we are led towards something, or stopped from going somewhere, by some incident or circumstance…there is a reason. Sometimes we find out what that reason is, sometimes we don’t. But when things start happening in a certain order, and these things rarely happen, if at all, then there certainly is a purpose.”

The only medical history of note my husband has is gout and I tell the surgeon this. He inquired about cholesterol levels and high blood pressure and I tell the doctor my hubby’s cholesterol levels were borderline high and was taking drugs to lower them. However, he had to stop because these could have drug interactions with his gout medications which he was presently taking under the care of his rheumatologist. (I knew then that they found something)

They found several blockages in the arteries of his heart. The surgeon had a printed copy of the angiogram showing the percentages of each blockage.  He explains what the diagram shows, and what exactly they did to fix it. They only fixed the most likely cause of the cardiac arrest which is an eighty percent blockage.

“We basically put a stent in his LAD (left anterior descending) artery because it had an 80% blockage. We think that this is the culprit that caused his arrest. He still has another 70% and a few more which range between 40-60%. After this procedure, we need to cool his body down one degree lower where he will be sedated. This will allow his brain and his whole body to be completely at rest. This aids in the healing after the trauma it has gone through.”

”Doctor, while you were in there, why didn’t you fix the other 70% blockage?”

”Given that we do not know exactly how long his brain was deprived of oxygen, and according to reports, the EMS did not get to him until about 10-15 minutes later, we are not even sure how his brain is doing. We would like to give his body time to recuperate from this ordeal and see how he is doing before we even look at the other one.”

At this point I mention the NSAID allergies and the doctor assures me he will mention it to the nursing staff to watch him closely.

“The nursing staff are just making him comfortable at this point, and they will let you know when you can go and see him.”

It is already about 1230 am by the time the surgeon leaves us in the waiting room. And it takes about forty five minutes more before I get to see him again. This time he is in an induced coma. His temperature is being maintained at 36’C and is being given sedatives.

The nurse tells me to go home and rest a bit while he is asleep. I did not want to go home simply because I knew I wasn’t going to sleep anyway, but I needed to take care of other things so I don’t need to worry about them later. Primarily, letting work know, both his and mine, that we won’t be coming in for the next weeks. When we were leaving and I was whispering to him that we will be back later, he starts to become restless again. They had to tweak his sedatives until he settles a bit before we are able to go.

I barely stayed away from the hospital, three hours later I was back there. I didn’t get any sleep. My mind just kept going and my tears just kept falling. I could have lost him and I wasn’t ready. How do you cope when this happens to the person you love the most? I could not even imagine not having him around. He was always the strong one, the healthy one.

I did not leave the hospital for that long anymore, simply because I was more comfortable just being near him. I would go home for about an hour just to shower, then I was back there. The nurses were kind encouraging to let me stay by his side, specially when he would be more at rest when I’m around. They wanted me there when they woke him up because it is usually better for the patient to have someone they know around when they first open their eyes.

Two days after the incident, we were going to wake him up.

“Don’t be alarmed if he does not wake up right away. Sometimes it takes up to two days for patients to be awake after such an ordeal. And don’t hold your hopes too high because we do not know how long his brain was deprived of oxygen.” These were the words the doctors and nurses were saying to me before we woke him up. I think they were trying to prepare me for the worst case scenario. But deep inside I knew he would be okay.

We woke him up after lunch on that day, he was kinda high on the drugs he was given. A little bit agitated and aggressive when he first woke up. However, even just after a few hours, he was carrying full conversations with everyone, whether it was with the doctors, nurses or with us.

Exactly a week later from when the incident happened, we were discharged from the hospital. He was still weak, with broken ribs from the CPR, and is taking a gazillion pills, but we will take it. I am extremely thankful that he is still around and be by my side. He is now doing Cardiac Rehabilitation, is completely mobile and alert, independent and is doing his best to get back to his life.

This story is full of angels, from beginning to end. The doctors and nurses at the hospital kept saying the person who saved his life was the nurse who first first started giving him CPR and the people who made sure his heart was pumping until the EMS were able to get his pulse back. But I would like to include the firefighters who first responded to the 911 call, the EMS who took him and got his heart going again, the doctors and most of the nurses who took care of him from the emergency department to the CICU and the regular ward. They were all instrumental to his recovery.

Each person who was there to help him through this ordeal was put there by God. Each of them an angel He sent to keep my husband alive. God has a mission for him and we are still trying to find out what this is. And while we are in the process of finding this out, we are lifting it all up to Him and thanking Him for the love He has shown us.

“Thank you, God, for your love and support. You have always been there for us and everything you have given us we lift it all to you. Help us to use all these blessings for Your greater glory.”

Photo courtesy of Google maps.

This is where it all happened on August 5, 2018.

The Day God Sent Angels to Save my Husband – Part II

“A little empathy towards others goes a long way…more often, we don’t realize how difficult the road the other person treads until we walk in their shoes and experience their pain.”

The social worker comes out to the window and recognizes me immediately from the photo on my husband’s phone. She ushers us inside.

”Your husband just came back from CT and is unconscious right now. He has a breathing tube down his throat and is on a ventilator which is helping him breath right now. ” (My world was slowly crumbling at this point, my knees were almost buckling, tears were falling down my cheeks.)  Try to be calm, he has a lot of tubes and lines connected to him. He collapsed on the side of the road and someone stopped to help him and gave him CPR.”

I walk towards the cubicle where he was and the sight of him on that bed with the end of the breathing tube sticking out of his mouth, his eyes half closed, unresponsive at this point, totally broke my heart. There were numerous lines coming out of his arms, as well.

Here is where I first meet one of God’s Angels. The ER doctor who took care of him in trauma was the same ER doctor who saw him when he had a biking accident not two and a half weeks earlier. The moment she saw me she hugs me and says: “I recognized him when they brought him in. I remembered him being an avid biker. His outfit clued me in.”

She released me and I walked towards him and kissed his forehead.

“I’m here, babe, I’m here. Please be okay.”

I’m trying my best to hold it together and listen to what the doctor was saying.

“The EMS brought him in as a trauma patient, he was unconscious and not breathing on his own so we had to intubate him. According to the EMS report, someone saw him fall on the side of the road while he was standing beside his bike and immediately called 911 (this person was the first angel God sent and I’m still trying to locate him). A nurse happened to stop when she noticed your husband lying on top of his bike on the ground unconscious and gave him CPR not even two minutes after he fell. (She was the second angel God sent) While she was doing CPR, another first responder and a nurse stopped to help her. One was holding his head to open his airway, and the other was blowing air into his lungs. A Physiotherapist noticed the commotion and stopped. She knew CPR and decided to help the nurse. (They were the next three angels God sent). A few minutes later, the firefighters arrived. They hooked him to a monitor and did not get a heartbeat. They had to use a defibrillator to get his heart going, this did not work so they continued to do CPR. (These are the next group of angels.) After about 12-15 minutes, the EMS arrive, took him to the ambulance and used the defibrillator again enroute to the hospitals here they finally got a pulse. (They were the next batch of angels God sent)

The ER doctor informed us they were just waiting for the CT results and if those came back clear they were going to page the cardiologist. I couldn’t give you a timeframe because after listening to the entire story, all I could focus on was holding my husband’s hand and running my fingers over his short hair.

My hubby is unconscious but restless, and I’m trying to whisper to him to calm down and that we were there. The doctor orders an increase in the sedatives to keep him calm. (When God’s Angels are around, the enemy sends his minions as well because…)One of the ER nurses inserts herself between me and the bed to adjust the sedative in his IV: “Excuse me. Can you please move. He can’t hear what you’re saying anyway.” (Huh! Doesn’t everyone say that even people who are comatose could hear you?) Where did this nurse get her training?

Then the other nurse is flushing his IV before giving the medication. I’m trying to ask her what she is giving and she just pushes the plunger before she answers. My husband is allergic to NSAIDS (his siblings and his dad all break out in hives with it and a few years ago, my hubby was having anaphylactic reactions which the doctors deduced must have been from NSAIDs)

“Aspirin,” she mumbles as she gives me an annoyed look. I just looked a her, asking myself what her problem was and thinking that I had the right to ask what they were all giving my unconscious husband. Later on it clicks to me that the aspirin could cause him a reaction. (Can’t help but think that she is another of those minions)

The CT results came back clear, so the cardiologist was paged and the ER staff were instructed to take my hubby up for an angiogram.  The ER doctor tells us the length of the test will depend on what they find. Either way, they will keep him in the hospital to find out what happened and why.

I bring my head close to him and whisper in his ear.

“They’ll be taking you for some more tests, we will be waiting for you in the family room. Please be okay.”

Time goes by so slowly when you’re waiting. My mind is going around in circles trying to piece everything together, and make sense of all that I was told.

I go through his phone and enter all the emergency details in it. It kills me that I wasn’t the one who received the phone call. They had left a message in our answering machine at home, but I was out. My name, despite it having ICE(In Case of Emergency) 1 beside it in his contact list did not say wife because he had put my place of work instead. (He assumed because it said ICE 1, that emergency services would call my number first when he was setting up everything on his phone.) I’m assuming they went down his recent calls and found mother there. So they gave her a call instead. Needless to say, I entered all my details under emergency contacts on his phone and also changed my contact details saying specifically ‘wife’ under mine.

It’s been two hours and no one has been out to give us updates yet. I am almost positive they found something and are already doing something about it. I tell my sister this and she tries to comfort me by saying they put him under sedation and he is probably in recovery.

A few minutes after midnight, a guy wearing the requisite scrub outfit comes out and calls my name. I stand and he shakes our hands while introducing himself as the cardiac surgeon. (He is the next angel God made sure was there. What were the chances of one of the top cardiac surgeons being on duty that night?) We all take a sit in the comfortable couches in the family waiting room and he says, “I don’t know what all went on before this happened, and before I start, I’d like to hear his medical history.”

The Day God sent Angels to Save My Husband – Part I

“As we tread through the path of life, always say I Love You and kiss your loved ones every chance you get, for you never know what’s on the other side of the bend”

Ever wondered whether angels exist? Well, I do!

On a warm, sunny Sunday afternoon, we were going to have a barbecue at my sister’s house to celebrate my niece’s birthday. She was visiting and her birthday happened to be during her stay with us.

My hubby wanted to go biking and take advantage of the weather. Here in Calgary we tend to take advantage of warm, sunny days because winter takes so long to finish once it sets. I tried to ask him to just go the next day since it was a long weekend anyway, but he was determined to go.

We were enjoying the barbecue with the rest of the family, catching up and having a great time. During this time the thought of looking at my phone tickled my thoughts. But my husband and I try not to use cellphones while having dinner.

Right after singing the birthday song, my brother-in-law’s phone rings. All I hear from his side of the conversation is that my husband collapsed and they took him to the emergency room at the hospital. I was on my feet even before he finished his sentence. Checking my phone, I realized that my husband texted me with a photo of the route he took. He said he was tired but was on his last leg, he was just taking a quick break for some energy and then he’ll be on his way. That was about an hour ago.

I was dialing his number and calling him, desperate to reach him. There was no answer. I decide to call the hospital and was transferred to the social worker.

“Someone called and said my husband was brought to the emergency.”

The social worker asked for my name and once I gave it she said: “Your husband was brought in to the emergency by ambulance (I put my phone on speaker so my sister could listen in), apparently he collapsed while biking and they did CPR. (My world just started closing in) They used a defibrillator twice and were able to revive him enroute to the hospital. He is stable at the moment, though it would be best that you get here right away. “

”Is he okay? Is he awake?” was all I could think of to say.

”No he is not awake right now, but he is stable. They are just bringing him to CT right now, so you don’t need to hurry. They’ll bring him back to emerge after his tests. Do you have anyone to drive you?”

”Yes, we will be there in a few minutes.” (We are stumbling out the door and getting into the car at this point.)

I had my sister and my niece, who are both nurses, with me. We didn’t even notice all the other people around us, we were just focused on getting to the hospital pronto.

My heart was racing, my hands were shaking, my mind was just running with a many horrifying scenarios. It felt like I was just watching a TV show.

I approach the windows at the Emergency Department Admitting Office.

“I am looking for my husband. I got a call and they told me he was brought in by EMS.”

The clerk asks me his name and types it in. She asks me to spell his last name, after a minute or so she says; “I can’t seem to find him here. Are you sure he was brought here and not to another hospital?”

I work in health care and I have some idea how the system works. My mind was racing and all I could hear repeating in my brain was: he wasn’t in the system and I’m praying inside: “Please dear Lord don’t let him be gone,” on repeat.

“How long ago did you talk to the social worker?” She asks again.

I snap out of my trance and try to concentrate on what she was saying. I told her I was talking to the social worker not ten minutes ago and was positive he was brought to this hospital. She checks again, still she doesn’t find him. (I’m freaking out internally and struggling to control my emotions). She advises me to go to the Triage window and inquire from there. The nurse on the window was standing there so I figured I could quickly ask her.

“I’m looking for my husband, they brought hi….”

”There is a line, go to the back of the line,” she says to me.

I’m shocked and couldn’t respond right away. I didn’t have the energy nor the wits to argue with her, so I walk to the back of the line with my niece. I knew for a fact I could not just stand there and wait, so I tell my niece to wait in line while I make another phone call to that very same hospital. I was at the brink of freaking out and trying my best to hold it together. People at the waiting room were giving me curious glances. I simply didn’t care.

The operator transfers me to the Emergency Department, “I was talking to the social worker a few minutes ago and she informed me that my husband was brought in to emergency by ambulance. I am trying to locate him.”

”Okay, what’s his name?” I give her the same spiel. “I’m sorry but I can’t find his name here.” I am losing it at this point. My voice is starting to rise.

“They called me and told me they brought my husband to this emergency department. Don’t tell me he isn’t here, because I was just talking to the social worker not ten minutes ago. He was brought in by ambulance unconscious and I have to find my husband. You have to find my husband!” I’m saying this in between sobs and with tears falling down my cheeks.

The lady on the other line asked me where I was and I told her I was in front of the emergency. She tells me to go to one of the windows and asks me again to spell the name of my husband. I could tell with her facial expression that she couldn’t find his name there. I’m freaking out inside and asked her to please find him. She pages the social worker at this point. (Don’t ask me why they didn’t do this the very first time I approached the first window) In the meantime, she is trying to talk to me and reassure me. (I must say it wasn’t working. I wouldn’t be reassured until I see my husband. Deep down was my fear that the worst had happened and I knew I wouldn’t know what to do if that were the case)

 

 

 

Cougar sightings?

“What the hell were you thinking showing up at the hospital, Ben? Worse, allowing a human to see you through the window?” Leon, hollered. 

“My lion saw my mate, Dad, she was walking across the parking lot. She works there as a nurse. I couldn’t stop my animal from following her and trying to get another glimpse at her.”

“Huh. Your mate?” Leon huffed, “you shouldn’t have allowed anyone to take a picture of you though. Now your image has gone viral in social media and was in the news! We’re supposed to be maintaining a low profile, what with Marcus’ wolf pack on the prowl. I’m just hoping no one recognizes you in your animal form. We’ve avoided detection for so long, son. I just want to prevent any confrontations with him and his mangy packmates.”

“I’m sorry, Dad. I’ll be more vigilant.”

“Alright. Anyway, congratulations on finding your mate, now go get her.”

“Thanks, Dad, I will.”

Ben was surprised his dad didn’t hear about the time he camped out of his mate’s apartment complex. That was bigger news since police and wildlife authorities were involved. They actually shot him with tranquilizer guns before taking him out into the mountains. That was one of his big mistakes because they took him deeper into the wilderness and he had to walk back home for three days. (Cue mental eye roll) 

Maybe he ought to lay low for a bit. Or maybe he should just go ahead and gather the courage to approach her. Lisa, just uttering her name makes him sigh in contentment. 

It’s been a while…

There’s been a huge lull in the world of the otherworldly until Easter night. Huh! I find it interesting that once again I’m on my way home on a dark highway. It’s just a little past one in the morning, the moon is still kind of full, though no longer blue. The night air is cold and crisp, and the ground is powdered with fresh, fine snow. There are twin red lights in the distance, otherwise, there are no other cars besides mine.

Some kind of movement on the right catches my eye in the distance. But when I flick my eyes towards it, I see nothing, so I ignore it. But after a few meters, there it was again, a dark shadow that fleetingly whizzes by and seemingly stops at the next road sign. I quickly glance towards where I saw it stop, but there’s nothing there. What was it? Where did it go? I glance at the rear view mirror and there it was still standing by the sign. 

The hairs on the back of my neck stand, goosebumps appear on my arms. I feel eyes on me and yet I couldn’t discern the face. It’s covered in shadows. I force my eyes back towards the road, and out of the corner of my eye I catch some movement again, and as I glance, it zooms ahead. Just as I see the exit turn I’m taking, I notice a dark shape standing in the shadows away from the street light. I turn my head but see nothing there, just the creepy feeling of being watched. I step on the gas pedal and avoid looking to the right side of the road. Whatever shadows were lurking there at this time of the night, I have no desire to meet them or know what they are. If they’re there to see me safely home, thank you. If so, it goes against what we generally know from stories of old that shadows mean harm…but maybe…not all the time? 

What goes bump in the dark on a snowy night?

Swish. Swish. Swish. Swish.

The sound of the wiper blades against my windshield was the only sound I could hear as I concentrated on the winding road. Millions of cornflake-sized snow fell from the dark heavens, their whiteness reflecting back the light from my car, making visibility difficult. When the weather is this bad and the weatherman warns everyone to stay indoors, if at all possible, that’s when you listen them. Unfortunately, as a nurse working at the emergency department in one of the major hospitals in the region, I did not have that choice.

As if the blizzard wasn’t enough of a challenge tonight, patients seemed to be coming out of the woodwork the entire shift. From victims of car accidents to hypothermia and cardiac arrests, everyone in the department was kept hopping all night. Then, just as our shift was supposed to be over, a guy having a gastrointestinal bleed came in via ambulance and our busy night turned into a nightmare. By the time I walked out of the hospital doors leading to the parking lot, it was already two in the morning. Three hours worth of overtime doesn’t seem to be worth it after working like a horse the entire shift. I’m sure I would appreciate the extra pay when I get my next pay cheque, but for now, I can’t bring myself to feel good about it.

My car was just crawling on the dark road. At this time of the night, I highly doubt anyone else was brave enough to drive anyway. My eyes felt a little bit gritty after staying awake for almost twenty hours straight now and it wasn’t easy to keep them open. I wish I could turn on the radio but with the weather conditions and driving through the mountain roads, I couldn’t find any decent reception. All I could hear was white noise. Besides, I need to concentrate on my driving or risk falling into one of the ravines at the side of the road.

The falling snow seemed to be tapering off and I could feel myself relax a little. I could see the dark shadows of the forest on the right side of the road a little bit. Suddenly, slight movement from the left side of the road caught my attention, startling me. I felt my hands jerk and the tires skid, making the car fishtail on the slippery road. My heart started pumping faster than it already was during the entire drive. Thankfully, I kept my presence of mind and tried to control the movement of the car by going against the direction of the tires while stepping on the brakes ever so slightly in small bursts. The slow speed I maintained helped me and I found myself stopped in the middle of a dark, winding highway up the mountain. I looked at my rear view mirror to check what it was I saw. Two sparkling eyes reflected back at me from the middle of the road. I squints to see what kind of animal it was. Was that a wolf?

My eyes grew bigger as I got a better view. That is a really big wolf staring back at me. I couldn’t tell what colour it’s coat was, I could barely make out it’s silhouette in the dark road behind me.  For some reason, I could not turn my gaze away from its eyes as they reflected from my tail lights. I was mesmerized by the intensity of its stare. I am not sure how long I stared back, but when it blinked, then raised its head and howled into the night, I snapped to attention and turned my gaze on the road ahead. Something inside told me to just step on the gas and drive away. I quickly glanced at my rear view mirror to catch another glimpse, but it was gone. I tried to look at my side mirror to check if it crossed to the other side of the road and thought I saw a silhouette of a well built man running into the forest. I blinked my eyes quickly to make sure I wasn’t imagining things, but just like the wolf, it too was gone.

Huffing to myself, I continued on my way. I couldn’t wait to get home, go to bed and sleep until this night was over. I must be so tired that my mind was starting to imagine things. Yet, something kept niggling in the back of my mind. A few weeks ago, it was shadows I saw at the side of the road on a foggy night and a passing thought about vampires crossed my mind.  Tonight it was a strangely huge wolf that turned into a man in the middle of a blizzard? What in blazes was going on with me? I must be going insane.

Shadows

It was almost midnight and a light fog settled on the highway. Every now and then another car would drive by in the opposite direction.

“I guess the weather people were right when they gave that fog advisory,” I commented.

“It’s not so bad,” Scott replied.

I shrugged and went back to playing with my phone.

After a few minutes, I felt the car slow down just a bit.

“I guess there are some patches where the fog is thicker.”

I looked up Towards the highway and out of the corner of my eye, I saw a dark shadow standing at the side of the road, and in the next instant it seemed to zoom across the road. A fleeting thought of “vampire” crossed my mind. I turned my gaze to my boyfriend, but Scott didn’t seem to notice as he didn’t react at all.

“That’s what you get for reading too many paranormal and fantasy novels,” I smiled to myself.

“Did you say something?”

“Nope.”

“Okay.”

The fog seemed to thin out as we drove nearer to the city. Near the exit ramp we were supposed to take, I happened to look up once again. The lights here were not working and the side of the road was a bit dark. Was there another shadow by the light post we just passed? I looked back but couldn’t see in the dark. Just as I was about to turn to the front, something moved in the shadows as we drove further away.

What were these shadows in the night? The first one I saw I could have passed off as my vivid imagination, but to see another one after several miles and actually notice some movement, I’ve got to wonder.

Could there be something out there that goes bump in the night? Specially with the fog and the distinct absence of the moon in the sky?